So we have hit the two month marker. In many ways, I feel as though Hazel has been with us for much longer. Sometimes it seems as though she arrived yesterday. Either way, she has managed to fit herself seamlessly into our lives. Maybe it is because I've been used to changing my life around for the dogs, but I find myself thinking that this parenting thing really isn't that hard. It isn't nearly as difficult as people told us it would be. We still manage to go out and see our friends. We go out to dinner with each other just about as much as we did before Hazel. Our house is clean, the fridge is stocked, her room is all finished, the dogs are exercised. We certainly are busy, but its a comfortable busy. I still found time to give myself a pedicure and I take a shower every day. We get a little less sleep, but that won't last forever and it isn't that bad.
The first couple of weeks were hard; trying to breastfeed while recovering from labor and delivery and having visitors every day all day was not easy. If it wasn't for Jamie, I think everything would have fallen apart. There was one really terrible night when Hazel was screaming and Jamie was at work very, very late. I almost lost my mind, but it ended and its far in the past now and it has not happened since. I am in complete awe of single mothers now.
I especially love our mornings together. Hazel wakes up next to me talking to herself, all wide-eyed. She gives me a smile when I open my eyes and I feed her. She has a long period of alertness and we use that time to play together and read books. Then I can put her in her bouncer seat in the bathroom while I shower. She starts to get overwhelmed and a little fussy, so I usually pop her in her sling so that she can calm down and nap while I clean up, make coffee, and let the dogs out. Our day the consists of bursts of sleep, play, running around town, and doing whatever needs to get done. Not everything gets done, but mama doesn't care. When Jamie gets home, I'm pretty sick of being mama so he gets to snuggle Hazel while I tie up loose ends around the house. There was a time when she wouldn't let me put her down, even for a second, even if she was in a deep sleep. That seems to have ended, so now I have all this free time when she is sleeping in her seat. I honestly think that when she is running around things will be harder than this, but way more fun, too. I'm really looking forward to all of that. This part, while not hard, is really mundane a lot of the time. That has been more of a struggle.
I had initially been a bit upset that we had no help with Hazel, especially when Jamie was having to be at work all the time, but now it doesn't bother me at all. Now I think that I'm glad that I didn't have much interference because Hazel and I have been able to learn about one another and make our own world together. We got through it with each other she and I, and we are a pretty tight team now.